Why did the old man fall in the well? Because he couldn't see that well. #dadjokes
How does a prostitute make more than a drug dealer? Because she can clean her crack and sell it again. #dadjokes
Crime... Police Officer: What do you remember about the midget who attacked you?Victim: Very little. #dadjokes
I was extremely drunk when I gave away all my money.... Guess I'm in the most generous of spirits when the spirits are generous....
I used to have a pet leech... It was attached to me. #dadjokes
I have a phobia of overengineered buildings. I have a complex complex complex
As I watched the dog chasing his tail, I thought, “Dogs sure are easily amused!”... ...then I realized I was watching the dog chasing...
“Hey, Watson, why are you taking Ex-Lax?” No shit, Sherlock.
The thermos A guy (MAN A) walks into a diner, sits down, and pulls a thermos from his backpack. Across the room, a man...
Face is a four letter word… But preface is a foreword letter… #dadjokes
A Tight-fisted Soldier. Two pals were strolling through a military graveyard to pay their respect to fallen heroes. They came across a peculiar gravestone...
Wife to Husband: "How would you describe me?" Wife: "How would you describe me?" Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK." Wife: "What does that mean?" Husband: "Adorable, beautiful,...
X-post from r/jokes: A woman walks by a clothes shop, and spots a nice red dress in the window. She goes inside to inquire:Woman:...
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Why do all hotdogs look the same? Because they are in bread.
How was the master thief able to steal the woman's skeleton? She had combination skin #dadjokes
Someone asked me how electricity is measured. I was like... Watt? #dadjokes
In a Catholic school cafeteria,... In a Catholic school cafeteria, a nun places a note in front of a pile of apples, "Only take...
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Wanna hear two short jokes and a long joke? Joke joke jooooke. Joke joke jooooooooooooke! #dadjokes
I hate those new parents who do all that baby talk... Yes I do! Yes I do! #dadjokes
A young boy is pulling his wagon up a hill when one of the back wheels falls off and rolls down the hill. The...
Accordion to a recent survey... ...replacing words with musical instruments in a sentence often confuses readers. #dadjokes
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When you kiss your honey, and your nose is kind of runny, you may think it's funny, but it's not. Snot
What do you call a court justice skilled in martial arts? Judge Judo! #dadjokes
Blondes & Computers Q: How are blondes and computers similar?A: You never appreciate them until they go down on you. #dadjokes