My Sleep Deprivation

My Sleep Deprivation

It started a few months ago. I had moved out of my parents house and into a studio flat close to my new university campus. At first I thought it was due to the stress of moving from home, starting my studies and my life changing. But I couldn’t shake this feeling. The foreboding sensations of something else present.

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At first it was the nightmares but as time went by they got worse. Grotesque, deformed and disfigured bodies, wielding faces of loved ones, gnawing teeth and flesh.

I awoke, moistened by fearful sweats, eyes laboured by lack of rest but stimulated by fight or flight. After a heavy sigh and the realisation of my surroundings, my body returned to its state of unbridled rest. But I only shared a moment of solidarity until the feeling returned. The feeling that something was out there, beyond the darkened corners of my perception, lingering within the absent light.

The concept of sleep soon tormented me, the knowledge of its necessity and yet the trepidation of what the closing barbaric hostility had to offer. Each night a wash of unnerving abject horror awaited my unconscious body. Each night the call became stronger. I could feel it. Whatever this undefined entity was, it was old. An ancient present incomparable to anything once described.

I felt small. Insignificant, in fact, to an unfathomable extent. Like the comparison of distance between stars. Or the size of a grain of sand to a supernova. It called for me night after night until it was unbearable. I awoke once more, my throat was sore from laboured breathing. I was standing facing a fractured image of myself. Shards of glass from the now shattered mirror scattered the floor. As feeling returned, I noticed a sharp pain emanating from my right hand. Warm viscous crimson marked the seconds as they fell from my exposed wounds.

I felt it once more.


Paralysed with fear, my muscles disobeyed me, like a scapegoat fit for bait I stood there. The weight of its presence hunching me to a pathetic form. I felt hopeless.

I dropped to my knees, cutting me deeper amongst the glimmering knives in the carpet.

A moment of strength snapped me to my senses.

I grabbed one of the largest shards and plunged it deep into my throat dragging and ripping the flesh from my neck. Collapsing further into prone I lay, half spluttering on the pouring flow from my salvation. I felt myself leaving this mortal plain only to be greeted by a familiar sense.

“You are now mine, now and forever”

Submitted February 10, 2019 at 08:11AM by ShiftySaul

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